Seattle Slim Presents The Beat-niks: I See You Jackin’ Bitch…

Wow! Way to show you are completely out of touch with rap and hip-hop, AMAs!!

Bone Thugs-N-Harmony, Young Jeezy and T.I. were nominated for the 2007 American Music Awards.

Nominees for the 2007 American Music Awards were announced yesterday (October 9) and Young Jeezy, T.I. and Bone Thugs-N-Harmony lead all hip-hop artists with two nominations each. The Awards, hosted by Jimmy Kimmel, will take place on November 18 at the Nokia Theatre in Los Angeles, Calif. For the first time in the AMA’s history, all the winners will be determined by online voting at ama.abc.com. “The Internet allows us to bring millions of potential voters into the voting process,” says Terry Bateman, CEO of Dick Clark Productions.

Personally, I think that Bone are the only ones that deserve to be there, but nominating T.I. and Jeezy isn’t what has captured my ire. Check out the complete list of nominees:

Rap/Hip-Hop:

Favorite Band, Due or Group:
Bone Thugs~N~Harmony
Pretty Ricky <----WHAT????? WHAT THE F*CK????
Shop Boyz <---- Oh COME ON!! Now they're just trying to have me go into labor early! Who did they suck off for this?????

Favorite Male Artist:
Fabolous
T.I.
Young Jeezy

Favorite Album:
Bone Thugs-N-Harmony – Strength & Loyalty
T.I. – T.I. vs. T.I.P.
Young Jeezy – The Inspiration

Didn’t Common come out with an album in time for this? Where are the good rappers? And Pretty Ricky????? I….quit….this….bitch.

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Atlanta rapper Young Jeezy celebrated his 100th birthday over the weekend and it was well….it just was.

I HIGHLY suggest he get a toupe or wear a hat because right about now he looks like a black vibrator with sunglasses on. He looks like a real d-ck.

Excellent fashion sense Zoe!!! Honestly I would ask him who he’s wearing and by that I would be referring to WHOSE ASS IS PLASTERED ON HIS SHIRT………..

The black Doodlebops were there. I mean T.I. and Tiny. I think they are short enough for me to rest my titties on their heads. Pregnant tits are heavy….

Ne-Yo aka The Black Darkwing Duck was there. Everytime I see him I think of a Black Koi Fish………

Are you still relevant Chingy? I’m waiting for him to write a book along the lines of “Talent Are You There? It’s Me Chingy!”

My dream isn’t to interview George Bush or Prince William or even Tavis Smiley or Cornel West. No! Those are whack interviews. If you want a real good interview with an articulate speaker who makes sense, you need a little Pimp C in your life!!!

Such nuggets of wisdom on……….

Having protected sex?

You’ve conducted some interviews recently that expressed some pretty offensive opinions, but you only apologized for your “Atlanta ain’t the South” statement. Any other apologies you wanna make?
Let me say this: That statement about Russell Simmons had nothing to do with his sexual orientation. It had more to do with a disagreement [we had]. I don’t know if the man likes Martians, squirrels or whatever, so I ain’t gonna speak on something that I didn’t see. It’s no gay-bashing with me. It’s just, be proud of what you are, instead of hidin’ in the closet. And if ya fuck boys in the ass, then don’t be tryna fuck with the girls, too, poisoning the pussy population wit’ ya shitty ol’ dirty-ass dick.

On who’s real in rap and who’s not….

Do you ever feel any compassion for Bun B, for being in a group with a man like yourself, who is unfiltered and can be bullheaded in his ways?
You been programmed to think I’m bullheaded. I just know what the fuck goin’ on. I know who’s a faggot (Let me guess Ne-yo? T.I? KANYE? I need answers! I know! Souljah Boy?????), I know who lettin’ them girls fuck ’em in the ass with them dildos (Oh that’s 50 Cent for SURE!!!), I know who really sold dope (Ummm NONE OF ‘EM *lol), I know who didn’t (Jeezy for sure!). I be in Houston. The only nigga I see [in Houston] goin’ to the mall by himself is Slim Thug. Other niggas, when I see ’em, they got bodyguards around ’em. How you gonna be scared of the neighborhood you supposed to be reppin’? All them [Houston rappers] that think they stars, guess what, bitch? Ain’t no stars down here. Only stars is in the muthafuckin’ sky!

For more of the interview, and believe me it’s a riot, Click Here!!

The HOT 107.9 Birthday Bash took place over the weekend and boy…were there a lot of donkeys performers! Let’s have a look-see at what transpired. I will say this: somebody ends up flat on their face on the floor.

I see D. Woods from Danity Kane made an appearance. Unfortunately her good weave ponytail didn’t. This whole outfit screams a combination of swap meet, Rave and Forever 21. Showstoppin’ indeed. I like D. Woods, not this outfit.

Stepin Fetchit DJ Unk was there to sing one or two of his two-hit wonders. If a song like “Walk It Out” can make him famous, my song “Hobble In” will surely do wonders for me!
Coming in at 12 minutes out of their 15 minutes of fame are the Shop Boyz. Looking at their faces I am GLAD they had on makeup like the band Kiss towards the end of the video. Damn! More pics under the labels!


Some kid named Big Korey performed. Big indeed. Glad to see he thinks rapping will take him far. Because we all know school won’t right? Am I right? Sure I’m right.

Ciara apparently did an impression of her CD sales in the first picture. Good to see she’s good at interpretive dance. I’m guessing that’s called the “flat line.” She does look Boyish nice.

Fabo from that group D4L….oh yeah you probably forgot already. Those guys that sang that “Laffy Taffy” song? Well here’s one of them at 14 minutes and 50 seconds of his 15 minutes of fame. Nice leggings.

Pubic Rick Ross showed up with his nest of pubes adorning his chin. He performed with DJ Khaled and apparently they dripped gravy all over each other during the performance. Tastes like chicken!

T.I. saw fit to show off his chicken chest as well as his narrow ass during his set. Pull up your damned pants. He looks like somebody’s grandfather who is too senile to recognize his pants are hanging off his ass. SMH!

Speaking of old men, Young Jeezy was there. What else is there to say? After he and his group U.S.D.A’s “White Girl” campaign, I’m speechless when it comes to talking about him. I’m still in shock.

(Thanks SOHH) Young Jeezy was arrested at Atlanta strip club, Stroker’s, for making it rain on hoes and sex in the champagne room “disorderly conduct” at 3:30 am this morning.

After being charged with disorderly conduct, Jeezy’s bail was set at $280 and he has since been released, Dekalb County Spokesperson Officer Mickey Jones told SOHH.

While details surrounding the incident remain unclear, reports have circulated that members of Jeezy’s entourage caused a disturbance while trying to pass security in order to enter Stroker’s. After Jeezy stepped in to calm the situation he was arrested and charged with disorderly

You know that Keyshia is gonna whoop his elderly ass if she hasn’t already, or shank him. One of the two. This reminds me of the skit on Black Rob’s first cd.
Black Rob:Hey…hold up I’m Black Rob.
Cop:Oh Yeah? Well I’m white cop now the get F-CK out the car!

Young Jeezy wants to make a few of his fans’ dreams come true! *sniffle* As I wipe this lone tear from my eye because I am moved from such generosity, I wonder if Mr. Jeezy can make MY dreams come true. A few would be:
- Stop saying “YEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAH” in every damned song.
- Stop saying “DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMN” in every freakin’ song.
- Stop lying on your age.
- Do something with your girlfriend’s hair stylist like say fire her, because it’s evident she can’t. That orange hair is freaky!
Thos are just MY wishes but I doubt he’ll grant me mine.

In order to promote his new single with Keyshia Cole, “Dreamin’,” Young Jeezy is holding the “Make Your Dream Come True” contest. The Snowman is giving his fans a chance to write, in 100 words or less, what their dream is and why Jeezy should make it happen. The Atlanta native will read all of the submissions, pick one lucky fan and make their dream come true. “Sometimes I look at my life and I’m amazed at how far I’ve come,” Jeezy says. “If it wasn’t for certain people supporting me, I don’t think I’d be able to accomplish what I have…that’s why I’m doing this for my fans. They’re the ones who helped to make Young Jeezy number one and it’s important that I give back to them. I wanted to do more than just say ‘thank you,’ I wanted to show them how thankful I am that they’re helping me realize my dreams. For me, this whole contest, and even my career will make me feel like I’ve accomplished a lot if I can help someone else realize their dreams too.”

If he hands out ONE pair of Jordans, or something bogus like that….I’m buying you ALL another round of drinks right before I throw myself off the top of the Space Needle.
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