Please get off of Kobe’s nuts already. It’s not that serious. Shouldn’t you be getting your house in order?

P.S. You and rap are an oxymoron.

Thanks,

The Committee for Shaq to Stop Rapping Before We All Commit Mass Suicide
Shaq Attacks Kobe: You Ruined My Marriage!

Whatever he’s on, I would like some with a shot of vodka.  STAT.

The folks over at AllTheParties.com just HAVE to know what’s up when they take these pictures. They just have to. I mean, I know the photographer saw them and knew he scored. I know he didn’t do it because he thought they were fine…

What would possess someone to think to that this is a good look?

This f*cka right here makes me MAD as all hell.  You SEE that your eyebrows are touching.  You KNOW that it looks like a caterpillar is setting up shop on your forehead, yet you do NOTHING.  This bothers me.  Men, PLEASE take care of your eyebrows.  This is just…*grabs head* I just….wow.

 I’m just saying, he looks like he belongs on Sesame Street.

I know he thinks he’s hard because he’s a rap cat and all that, but rapper or no rapper, tweaze that sh*t man.

I figure I could make a killing importing Barbie dolls into Iran man! I could even customize those shits and have Nuclear Reactor Barbie and Anti-Western Barbie complete with American flag and a match to burn it!!! I’m RICH BITCH!

A top Iranian judiciary official warned Monday against the “destructive” cultural and social consequences of importing Barbie dolls and other Western toys.

In the latest salvo in a more than decade-old government campaign against Barbie, Prosecutor General Ghorban Ali Dori Najafabadi said in an official letter to Vice President Parviz Davoudi that the doll and other Western toys are a “danger” that need to be stopped.

“The irregular importation of such toys, which unfortunately arrive through unofficial sources and smuggling, is destructive culturally and a social danger,” said the letter, a copy of which was made available to The Associated Press.

Iranian markets have been inundated with smuggled Western toys in recent years partly due to a dramatic rise in purchasing power as a result of increased oil revenues.

While importing the toys is not necessarily illegal, it is discouraged by a government that seeks to protect Iranians from what it calls the negative effects of Western culture.

Najafabadi said the increasing visibility of Western dolls has alarmed authorities and they are considering intervening.

Well I wonder if maybe WE didn’t have that damned Barbie if black chicks would be running around the place dying their hair platinum blonde and wearing unrealistic contacts. I’m just being real with it…

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Okay so it was MIGHTY nice of Shawty Lo to hand out prizes and groceries, but could he have handed out other more beneficial things? I wouldn’t have DREAMT of making it rain in a damned hood. That’s ASKING for a stampede.

I had to stop at this because, aside from these people standing way too close to each other for my taste–I’m a bit of a germophobe–I noticed that bruh man in the front was wearing what LOOKED like a sports bra. 

 Now I don’t know about you, but I would be pissed as all f*ck to be the one to wear that if I had balls.  That’s just me…

Yeah I’m a little late but not so late. The only reason I mention this is that it’s ludicrous. Blogging doesn’t kill you and it probably had little to nothing to do with the deaths of the bloggers (R.I.P).

What does probably pose a danger is sitting on your ass blogging all damned day, stuffing twinkies in your trap and not doing shit for exercise. But that’s the same thing that will kill Joe Blow at his nine to five in the “cotton fields.”

Here’s the interview with Perez Hilton via CNN. Can I just say that it’s UNACCEPTABLE to be making that much damned money and still not manage to get and honor a gym membership?? Fuck outta here…

(Spotted at C&D

UMMM no. Actually not just no, but HELL no. Marc Anthony and Jennifer Lopez are all up in People Magazine fronting on having newborns. Straight B.S.! It doesn’t look like that. Well it shouldn’t. I only wish me and Senor Slim looked this fresh faced and well rested after just ONE night with our newborn.

I wake up looking and feeling like I was on a 3 day coke binge; Senor Slim looks even more tired. The Devil is a liar and I rebuke this spread!

Okay not really but technically he is right? I mean those two movies RUINED it for him.
Don’t you just love when some white folks blame black people for their own personal shortcomings? Sounds like a Republican to me…or a Hillary Clinton supporter.

OH!!!!!!

Well DAMN Toccara! Teach ‘em! Tell ‘em how you really feel! Don’t hold anything back girl! Speak up!

Seriously Toccara lost her f*ckin’ marbles and WENT OFF on the judges on Celebrity Fit Club. Okay! I GET it! She is happy with her body. Hell I think her body is GORGEOUS! Matter of fact, if she was SOOO damned happy, why IS she on the damned show anyway? It’s called Celebrity Fit Club, not Celebrity FEET Club or EAT club. It is what it is. She was on the show once before so why the surprise?

I am too sorry but I can’t ride for her on this one. If you’re so happy then don’t waste anybody else’s time. Celebrity Fit Club call me! A sister is trying to lose a few of these extra baby pounds in time for the “summah!”

I’m betting this gets a Golden Globe, Oscar, Academy Award, Spirit Award, SAG Award, YOU name it!  If Beyonce is behind it, it will be the best movie EVER made!  TRUST!

Martin Scorcese better fall BACK!

Beyonce Knowles has signed on to star in and executive produce the upcoming Sony BMG Films 1950s period movie Cadillac Records. Beyonce will play blues singer Etta James in the film, about the seminal Chicago record label Chess Records and its founder, Leonard Chess, who started out selling albums out of his Cadillac. James, Muddy Waters, Howlin’ Wolf, and Chuck Berry are among the legends who recorded on Chess. Darnell Martin (Their Eyes Were Watching God) is directing and also wrote the screenplay. Adrien Brody has already been cast as Chess, and Jeffrey Wright (Waters), Cedric the Entertainer (Willie Dixon), and Columbus Short (Little Walter) are also on board.

NOT COOL! Neither Kelly Rowland nor Michelle Williams got bit parts? They couldn’t even get parts at the groupies for like Howlin’ Wolf? *SMDH* Beyonce is still sh*ttin’ on those broads.

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According to XXL.com, Eminem is set to release his autobiographical book The Way I Am on October 16th. I’m wondering, isn’t it more aptly titled Am I Still Relevant?

Eminem and publishing house Orion Books are set to release a new book featuring never before seen photos, journal notes, hand drawn illustrations and lyrics from the rapper. Em will also be penning the book’s introduction and contributing his own narrative throughout.

Can we get an album too though? I mean damn…

Okay I just had to share this piece of reader mail because it probably is one of the most bizarre letters I have EVER gotten……

Meet MC Funky J *side eyes* and he has MAD beef with KRS-One.  The letter explaining his “beef” was coconuts.  Read it below:

I wouldn’t be droppin for no less than righteousness. He is a str8 up Hiphopycrite. I was a member of the Temple since 99′ but even before that I was a huge fan of KRS.

I rolled with him for a year and during that time I unraveled the man behind the image we all know him by.

6 Years I wasted being a member of the Temple of HypeHope and was eventually promoted to the Head of the Dept of Society.

I can’t disclose to much info at this time but I promise everything is and will be backed up.

I am risking my life for this.

All I know is the cat has pictures of him and KRS-One on his page and pictures of this “temple.” I will say that “reefer madness” is alive and well…apparently.

Check out his “diss” track at www.Myspace.com/McFunkyJ

Alright, Mr. Ross! I’m ready for my close-up!

You can add producer to Rick Ross’ resume in addition to correction officer and one half of the Bacon Grease and Pubic Brothers. Rick has signed on to produce M.I. Yayo, a documentary about the drug industry in Miami.

Miami native Rick Ross has inked a distribution deal with Boston-based Traffic Entertainment for the release of his documentary M.I.Yayo. The film explores the billion-dollar cocaine industry that helped build the rapper’s hometown by examining the city’s 10 most notorious drug lords. Director Chris Larceny has compared it to the wildly popular documentary Cocaine Cowboys, but with a greater emphasis on the actions and mind states of the people intimately involved in the business. The film uses news footage, first hand accounts and interviews with the friends and families of those involved to document the influx of money into Miami in the 80’s and 90’s and its effects on the city.

I bet he shows up to the set with a beret and a loud speaker, wearing knickerbockers and an ascot.

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