Seattle Slim Presents The Beat-niks: I See You Jackin’ Bitch…

Mariah Carey was in NYC to launch her new fragrance “M by Mariah Carey” at Macy’s. Ah great! More piss and oil from another celebrity eh? I know what to spray all over my neighbor’s doorstep if they piss me the hell off then.

Next Door Neighbor: “Honey, what is that stench? Did you sh*t in the trash? I mean damn!”

When was the last time Vanessa Carlton was even relevant? Apparently she is not a fan of Mimi’s and it showed at a recent event.

FROM whom does Mariah Carey need Secret Service-style protection? Page Six spotted the smiling star at the Save the Music event at Lincoln Center Thursday night flanked by eight massive bodyguards. As a friendly Mariah made her way around the tent greeting fellow music industry folks John Mayer, John Sykes and Jon Bon Jovi, her goons intently blocked other guests from her path with commands of “Get out of the way! Mariah’s coming!” They also shut down the bathroom for 10 minutes while Carey primped. Meanwhile, someone should have been watching over Vanessa Carlton when Mariah was getting her award. The under-the-radar songstress was overheard cackling, rolling her eyes and making nasty comments throughout Carey’s acceptance speech. Throughout dinner, Carlton made a point to remind fellow guests that she is actually famous. “I have more than one song,” she announced to the table - but got severely agitated when The Post’s Marianne Garvey mistook an Avril Lavigne music video for one of hers.

If people can’t tell the difference between you and Avril Lavigne then you need to start “f*ckin’ for tracks” and get relevant again. I’m just saying…….

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I guess stamps are cool because Mariah Carey was there to celebrate the unveiling of the new jury duty stamp. WTF? She does look nice though and the shoes are sweet!