Seattle Slim Presents The Beat-niks: I See You Jackin’ Bitch…

Oh RLY?

Brandy’s untalented little brother, and amateur D-list porn star, Ray-J is hanging on to those last 30 seconds of fame the best way he knows how.

According to Janet Charlton and Ballerstatus.com, Ray-J has released an underground rap album/mixtape rife with filth and mysogyny.

Via a new mixtape, titled Ray J Unkut, created with DJ Kay Slay, he talks about Kim and their relationship, among other things. It features tracks such as “No Porno Sh–,” “Spendin’ All My Bitches’ Cash” and “Kim K Message (Parts 1 & 2),” a remix of Kim’s private voicemails to Ray J recorded shortly after news of the sex tape broke.

“What I want to do is make sure people are entertained with great stories, and that’s what I deliver on this CD,” he said. “I’m puttin’ it all out on the table. I talk about my boys f—in’ their homegirls and Paris [Hilton] don’t like it… I’m incorporating my life into my music, which is the only honest way to be.”

He even alleges and I am sure it is 100% true that Paris Hilton gave him herpes. WTF? And this cat has a six film deal with porno giant Vivid Entertainment???? He better be wearing a full body condom for his scenes.

A while ago, the internets buzzed (a little) about how Kim Kardashian’s teen sister worked the stripper pole like her name was Strawberry at Body Tap.

But this is just rich! On a recent episode of “Keeping Up With The Kardashians,” her two youngest siblings showed out AGAIN, this time pretending to be “Girls Gone Wild.” They lifted their shirts (no chest was shown), and played with what else? The stripper pole. Guess who was filming? Their older brother’s friend. WTF?

Their mom must be proud. All her daughters are jumpoffs. Pretty soon Karrine Steffans will have take lessons from these little hoes…..

Jenna Jameson looks like sh*t on a stick. PLEASE don’t piss on my head and tell me it’s raining. She is either anorexic or bulimic and I’m sticking to it. Her lips have taken on the look of her very “used” vajayjay. NOT a good look…..

Ms. Jay from America’s Next Top Model. And moving right along….

I HATE you Amanda Lepore. We must live in a wonderful world where ugly goes on looking like this and NOBODY goes the f*ck off on her in the streets. I would if she were near my kids just for scaring them.

Mya I have no words. Actually I am LYING. This looks like some 6 year old’s Disney “Princesses” dress that had seen ONE too many tea parties. This is so FUG, I just want to slap her. When your friends let you walk out the house looking a mess, I call it the “Britney Spears Factor” and Mya is definitely giving me that vibe.

We can say what we want about Kim Kardashian but I will say this, she isn’t anorexic or emaciated! I like that! And Mel B. looks positively BANGIN’ for having just had a baby a few months ago. *Lone tear falls from my eye* It gives me hope! They both look great! Stick it to these stick figure b*tches ladies!! Nicole Richie really need to see y’all chef!

Kim Kardashian enjoyed her unemployment hosted a party at Mansion in Miami and all the donkeys were there, INCLUDING, Chudney Ross.

Ladies and gentlemen, I must ask why? Why does Chudney do this? Chudney is not an ugly girl, she just takes VERY BAD PICTURES. They are horrible. But she insists on letting them out. *SMDH* You know Kim dragged her into the pics to guarantee her pictures would come out hot.

I’d been meaning to get around to this but never did, so sorry! Hope it hasn’t been done. Anyway, seeing as how Kim Kardashian and Aubrey O’Day are such good friends, I wouldn’t be surprised if Aubrey borrowed this outfit from Kim. While it’s not weird, it is kind of….gross. Kim’s probably got kids all over that jumper. Hope Aubrey washed it first…..

Who do you think looks better?

Yeah a little mean, but true. The looks stopped at ONE child and fuck all went to the other two sisters. Kim, Kourtney and Kloe Kardashian (The KKK sisters) were out to celebrate the 5W PR Summer Soiree. Stuff your faces ladies! As for the last picture with Kim and model Claudia Jordan, I’m sure that wasn’t a very hard pose for them to pull off. The only variation is that they are probably on their knees when they do it. Good look!

Ashanti finally came out of whatever hole she was hiding in and attended the Lorraine Schwartz Diamond Monkey event. She looks better than she has in a long time. Those other pictures she took over the last few months were an open statement to the fuckery of effort. Word of advice to Ashanti, don’t let Kim Kardashian know who you are dating, especially if he’s black. I’m just saying…..

Can somebody, anybody tell me WHY Ray-J is so popular with the ladies? Come on he looks like a Preying Mantis and he’s a jackass. I guess Kim doesn’t like an old maid like Whitney on her very sloppy and diseased seconds. According to Contact Music Ray-J was the reason for Kim’s rage at Whitney! OOOH! LOSER FIGHT!!!!

Fiery messages socialite KIM KARDASHIAN left on ex-boyfriend RAY J’s voicemail about his new love WHITNEY HOUSTON have been sampled in a controversial new R+B hit. Kardashian, who appeared on a leaked sex tape with her ex last year (06), blasted Ray J and his new girlfriend in phone messages, which were recorded after the R+B star’s voicemail was hacked into. Ray J explains, “There’s this 1-800 number, where you can check people’s messages through this spy company. I guess somebody did that. “Then they put a soundtrack to the s**t… and now it’s going to be Kim dissing Whitney, Kim talking s**t to me about the bitches I’ve f**ked.”

So eloquently put Ray-J! Ray-J knows he’s a catch. What broad wouldn’t want him??? I’d walk up to George Bush and punch him dead in the mouth to get some ass from Ray-J NOT!

Chrisette Michele outside of the “Late Show With David Letterman” making her way in. She is so gorgeous! Love her look. And her voice is even better. Yet another great singer.

Nicole Richie was also at the Letterman show looking like two toothpicks on a stick. What’s new???

Caridee English was on hand for ESPN Magazine’s Summer Fun Party Hosted by Taye Diggs and Laila Ali in NYC. Her makeup makes her look dead. Inflect SOME color please!

Laila looked STUNNING! I really noticed how gorgeous she was on “Dancing With The Stars.” She doesn’t disappoint here.

Taye Diggs doing his best to look like an ass. Word of advice: THOSE HATS DO NOT FIT YOU. That is all…..

Kim Kardashian may be a groupie have a bad rep but she always looks good. Love this outfit and her body is banging. She was on hand for Caroline D’Amore’s Birthday Party in West Hollywood. And guess who else was invited:

Can someone please tell me who invited Leilene from “Flavor Of Love” and “Charm School?” I’m just asking. Who would’ve thought that making an ass of yourself on national television would get you into parties. Her shoes are whack.