Seattle Slim Presents The Beat-niks: I See You Jackin’ Bitch…

Look at who was invited to also make asses out of themselves the BET Hip Hop Awards! Why it’s Bryant Purvis and Carwin Jones of the Jena 6! Look at how nice they look!! See these boys look so innocent! They don’t even look like they could be thugs…………….

I’m sorry, but if they were trying to convince folks that they weren’t thug ass idiots, they certainly dropped the ball this time. If I marched down in Jena, and I had seen these little f*cktards dress like this, I’d write the DA my damned self begging him to lock them up.

How the hell are you going to show up to the BET Hip Hop Awards dressed like an ass? And since when does stomping some kid out warrant getting an invite? SMDH.

(Spotted at Bossip!)

That T.I. sure can party right? I mean really…..
Rapper Clifford “T.I.” Harris was arrested in an ATF sting on Saturday for illegally attempting to buy machine guns and silencers. His bodyguard was the informant that provided the info to the feds. According to Bossip, it all started with him, along with his baby mama Tiny, being arrested for a fight at a strip club in Atlanta. It was all downhill from there apparently.

According to Reuters:

T.I. was arrested after an undercover operation by ATF agents that started on October 2 when ATF agents learned an individual was seeking to buy machine guns without registering them, the Justice Department said in a statement.

That individual, who turned out to be a bodyguard for the artist, was arrested on Wednesday after paying $2,200 for three machine guns, two silencers and a pistol.

He said he was buying the guns for T.I., and with the blessing of ATF agents arranged to deliver them to T.I.’s house on Saturday.

“Harris (T.I.) then agreed to meet and took possession of the machine guns this afternoon. He now faces serious federal charges and a potentially long prison sentence,” the statement said, adding that T.I. would appear in court on Monday.

Three other firearms were found in the vehicle T.I. was driving and during a search of his home in College Park six other firearms were found a bedroom closet.

He had better have a good explanation for this because John Q. Law is not playing this year. If you’re a convicted felon, but rich as all hell, why would you do something so stupid as buy an armory’s worth of weapons? What was he trying to go for? Was he vying for “Best Human Impression of Fort Knox?” Get the hell out of here……

Oh boy! There is much to cover thanks to the BET Hip Hop Awards. *SMDH* I am truly at a loss for words. Let me get the pictures out of the way and then on to the drama with black doodlebop Clifford “T.I.” Harris. Lots of pics so yeah, enjoy!

This picture here sums up the state of hip hop. *SMDH* It’s not that I couldn’t find anything wrong with this picture, it’s just how much time ya got? I notice that gregarious ass chain he used to wear is missing. Behind on some payments, Joc?

Trina looked awkward. This looks like a photo outside of homecoming. I kind of like the dress though.

That’s right! BET is for the CHILDREN!!! COONING is for the kids!!

This picture says “homo-erotica” plain and simple. This is wrong on so many levels.

Where is Mims’ neck????? He reminds me of this Barbie doll I used to have after I broke her neck. I just forced the head back on to the body. She was never the same.

Keyshia looks like a wasp that went through too much white pollen in this picture. What did you want me to say? This is the vibe I get!

If I were KRS-One I wouldn’t have shown up personally. He looks happy to be there…….

Lil’ Mama looks nice for a change.

Aw come on man! Are there really no shirts? Vanity is a bitch.

LOL at Polow Da Don looking like the dweeb that he is. But is it bad that I like those glasses?

Ciara hid her man-shoulders! Good look! Now you just need some tits and you’ll look like a full-grown woman! LOL I kid.

David Banner cleans up nice!

Still trying to stay relevant eh, Hurricane Chris? What was he nominated for? The “Won’t Be Around Next Year” award?

Jazze Pha must find it incredibly difficult to move his head considering he has no neck.

WHY??????????

Big Boi looks like a black punk rock hobbit.

Aww Bun B has a wife?? Very cute couple.

This picture scared me. Cassidy looks like a spitting cobra.

Chingy is actually bothering the photographer for some spare change to help pay off that suit he rented.

After seeing Beyonce in this getup it sure seemed that she was channeling Whitney Houston in “Queen Of The Night” from “The Bodyguard.” You be the judge.

I would like to say that Beyonce looked stunning but she looked blinding first. I am not quite sure what to make of the chastity belt/corset she has on. It even has a little lock like mechanism on the very front. I mean it’s not a bad dress but it’s a little too S&M for my taste but it’s the BET Awards! Nobody cares what they wear to that shit! *big smile*

I like how Rihanna is so star struck at seeing Beyonce. I bet the exchange was like this.
Rihanna: Oh my GOD! I love you! I hear so many good things about you from Jay-Z! It’s an honor to meet you! You look SO nice!
Beyonce: Bitch get the fuck away from me before I make Solange whoop your ass.

No need to wait until tomorrow! Seattle Slim puts in OT for awards shows! Let’s get the party started…..

ANGIE!!! Where have you been? I haven’t seen her since VH1’s Celebrity Fit Club. Good to see that she has kept some of the weight off. I need her to release another album for me though…..

Assface Yung Joc and Amerie posed in all their D-listed glory. Ah! Non-talent love!

Who invited the Cheetah Girls???

Chudney Ross is such a cute person but God…..her facial expression and smile is just HARD to look at. It seems like it HURTS!

The lovely Ms. Erykah Badu in all her glory. She can do no wrong…

ATL and Chitlin Circuit actress Lauren London was there to get some free stuff.

The zestfully irritating Pretty Ricky boys were there. There are so many things wrong with this picture I won’t even waste the time. I hate the motherfuckers.

The Shop Boyz showed up this year. The clock is ticking bitches!!! 15 minutes will be up in NO time and you will not be there next year.

Sean Kingston has a cute little song out on the radio. They are KILLING it in Seattle. That’s my Jamaican cousin and all but I must say that I hope his swag bag included some Pro-Activ in it. I’m just saying…..