Seattle Slim Presents The Beat-niks: I See You Jackin’ Bitch…

That dirty bitch Kate Moss! She doesn’t deserve this hot man! No sir. I DO! What he needs is a girl that can really clean his warts right! Who can make sure his scabs heal right, you know what I mean? A real ride or die and not vomit chic. That’s me. I wouldn’t gag when I had to do his bi-weekly oil scrapings off his skin! Watch your back, Moss!

Yeah a little mean, but true. The looks stopped at ONE child and fuck all went to the other two sisters. Kim, Kourtney and Kloe Kardashian (The KKK sisters) were out to celebrate the 5W PR Summer Soiree. Stuff your faces ladies! As for the last picture with Kim and model Claudia Jordan, I’m sure that wasn’t a very hard pose for them to pull off. The only variation is that they are probably on their knees when they do it. Good look!

A little crass? Sue me. I blame the BET Awards for this. Just when I was recuperating from seeing Trick Daddy and Rick Ross at the Ozone Mag event earlier this week, curiosity killed MY CAT again upon clicking on this picture. After seeing this picture, I’ve decided to go celibate until I see Reggie Bush’s picture again until Mr. Beatnik can dress like a Roman Centurion for me again. Webbie, you have ALL of this money but your Oscar The Grouch looking ass can’t go get Ms. Kim to wax your shit???? Come on now. Jazze Phe, there are no words.
This is what you really look like Webbie! Come on now!

Why am I happy as hell? I won’t even front anymore. See this is what the crappy recording industry has done to me. Back in the day these girls were whack, but now that things have gotten worse they are the lesser of two evils. Go figure! I guess listening to “Umbrella” by Rihanna all over the damned place will make you crack. That and I don’t feel as old lol. They make having kids look good…..

Hey just real quick, yesterday after alot of grinding and going to bed late, dedication pays off. Over 1,000 views and return visitors included. THANK YOU! I like to be appreciative because every little milestone is important to me. I like to make people laugh or whatever so if you crack up after reading one of my posts, my job is done. It’s not the “cutest” nor the most “prestigious” but it’s mine and I’m having fun along with my guy AWG. So thank you!!!! Now on to today’s dismantling of celebrities!

R&B singer Usher and his fiancee and wet nurse Tameka Foster have confirmed that they indeed are expecting their first child together. Congratulations to the May-December couple on their first child! An even bigger congrats to Tameka on her bait and snare game! Who says cougars can’t get these young boys??? If you remember the pictures I posted on Monday of Tameka and Jamie Foxx, you would also remember I confirmed her pregnancy first after seeing her baby bump. This really isn’t a surprise to me. Took her ass long enough. Perhaps she read the blog and decided to come out after her pictures were so obvious? Hmmmmmm……..

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I apologize. For all the times I saw one or two of you do a mix between the chicken and the booty wop and laughed until I snorted beer out my nose, I apologize. For all the times I laughed when you looked at me weird for doing the “ratchet” or the “poole palace” I will eat all that. But I only do so to my readers. Outside of this blog nobody else should get a hold of this. We must uphold that we can dance!!!! If word got out that one of us couldn’t dance, we’d be fucked!

British pop tart Lily Allen had this to say about “personal hygiene” while out on the town with newyorkmag.com.
“Here they get their [hoo-has] waxed. I get a strip, a runway strip. I don’t think I could get it done in England. They stare at it. They spend ages doing it. It’s like, ‘Get it over and f-ing done with!’”
(Spotted at Us magazine)

Look we all knew these broads couldn’t sing to begin with. But I’m surprised that it’s so bad that basically the computer is singing for them. Sheesh! Apparently for their rumored upcoming tour they’ll have pre-recorded, perfected studio tracks of the songs they are performing. If one of them should crack like a pre-pubescent boy, then the computer will automatically shut out their actual voice and use the track. I’m thinking that Rihanna, Kelly Rowland, Ciara, Janet Jackson and Britney Spears need to get their accountant on the ball pronto. Especially you Kelly! That performance last night was so crappy I had to turn my volume up.

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Click Here To Read. This topic is about the reality of society’s standard of beauty……and why being too “nappy” not sexy but to “mumbutu.”